Surviving Trauma and Emotional Abuse
Surviving Trauma and Abuse: Pathways to Healing and Resilience
Trauma and abuse—these can be emotional, physical, sexual, or psychological. It can leave deep scars that influence every aspect of your life. The journey toward healing is often hard and not a straight path. It requires you to be patient with and to forgive yourself. Understanding how to navigate this path is essential if you’re goal is to reclaim your life and build your confidence.
Recognizing and Validating Your Experience
The first step in surviving trauma and abuse is acknowledgment. You may struggle with feelings of shame, guilt, or denial. The first step to beginning the healing process is recognizing that what happened was not your fault. Talking with trusted friends, family, or mental health professionals can help you understand your experience and foster a sense of safety.
Seeking Professional Support
Therapy plays a critical role in recovery. Approaches such as trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), or somatic therapies can help process traumatic memories and reduce their emotional impact. A mental health professional can also assist in developing coping strategies to manage symptoms like anxiety, depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Every person is different and not all methods may be right for you. Remember to keep going forward and find the process and avenue that works best for you.
I personally, made a choice to spend time reading, getting educated about what was actually happening to me. Once I realized that I was not crazy and that the life I was living was not normal, I decided to make a change and focus on getting my mind straight and building my confidence back up. Here are some of the resources that helped me tremendously.
Building a Support System
Some of us often benefit from connecting with others who understand our experiences. Support groups, whether in person or online, can provide a sense of community and validation. Building trusting relationships with empathetic individuals will help to foster resilience and reduces feelings of isolation.
Prioritizing Self-Care
Healing requires nurturing yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually. This includes maintaining a balanced diet, engaging in regular physical activity, practicing mindfulness or meditation, and ensuring adequate rest. Creative outlets like art, music, or writing can also serve as therapeutic tools. I personally have spent a lot of time with my boys. Embracing every single second and realizing how incredibly lucky I am to have the family I do. Find your team, let them help you (I have not been typically good at accepting help). Let them love you and be so grateful to have them. Keep telling yourself about all of the good things in your life. I know that it might feel like there isn’t a lot. I have felt like a failure – I’m not, and I am not going to continue feeling guilty for being taken advantage of. I do not feel bad about loving with my whole heart, for giving so much that I lost myself. Be thankful that you survived and were able to get out.
Finding positive things in your every day life can be difficult at first. I know I wanted to just curl in a ball and just let life keep happening “to” me, until the day I decided I wouldn’t. I had lost so much of myself but, there was a tiny spark let in there that I could hear–“you were meant for more than this”– and you are too! I embraced yoga and meditation, I know that that might not be for everyone but, I needed a way to calm my racing mind. I started walking every morning, bonus points awarded if you can get outside and combine some nature with your steps. When you are out there – listen to what’s around you, feel the breeze embrace your senses.
Establishing Boundaries and Safety
For many of us, establishing boundaries is the most important for reclaiming control in your life. This might mean limiting contact with your abuser, creating personal safety plans, or setting firm limits in relationships. Feeling physically and emotionally safe is foundational to healing. Creating a safe place for myself and my kids has been my north star. I am no longer willing to live a life where I walk on eggshells, where I never know if I share my feelings they will be met with belittling or even worse not even recognized as legitimate. I am slowly learning not to be small, or be quiet. Own your voice and find strength in it.
Embracing Patience and Compassion
Recovery is never a straight line or an easy path. Some days will be harder than others, and setbacks can and will occur. Give yourself grace, you did not arrive here overnight and should expect it to take some time until you can feel like yourself again. Celebrating your small victories – your good days or even moments can boost your confidence and motivation. Most of all stay the course. One day you will find yourself on the other side of the chaos, the pain and nothing will ever be so important.
Empowerment and Moving Forward
Overcoming trauma and abuse involves taking back your power over your own life. You can do this by remembering what your interestsare, setting goals, and creating a sense of purpose. Many people that have survived this kind of abuse find strength in advocacy, activism, or helping others who are going through similar experiences.
Final Thoughts
Surviving trauma and abuse is a so very hard and requires a great amount of strength. It requires resilience, support, and ongoing effort. While the scars may remain, healing is possible. With access to the right resources and compassionate support, you can rebuild their life, grow your inner strength, and thrive beyond your past experiences. Remember, you are not alone, and help is available on the path to recovery.
